I sit down to write on a Friday night, almost Mother’s Day, a day I wish I could ignore. I’d just like to pretend it’s another Sunday. Between social media, retail displays, and church, Mother’s Day is not forgotten.

I’ll be the first to say it’s a really hard day for those of us whose life dream is motherhood, those of us whose wombs and arms remain empty. As I’ve shared recently, overall, I really am okay. We’re hopeful, prayerful, looking at new medical intervention, and not ready to quit… but I’d still like to forget about Mother’s Day. (Apologies to my Mom and Mother-in-law, I didn’t mail cards.)

If you’re also aching from infertility this Mother’s Day, I’m going to share the words that I received today. I arrived home from work, feeling tired, ready to eat my Friday night pizza. I opened the mailbox in the rain to bring in several days worth of mail. I saw two personal notes addressed to me. “Should I open my Mother’s Day cards tonight?” I asked my husband. “Or should I wait until Sunday?”

I opened my cards. The first one slid out of its envelope, from a dear friend.

NOT FORGOTTEN, she had written across the front.

N O T   F O R G O T T E N

Thanks for making me cry, I thought.

I opened the second, a thoughtful card from my parents. Then I flipped open my computer, and the page before me was a blog post by a young mama I know, a tribute to those struggling this weekend. Her title? “Forgotten Mothering.”

The words I kept reading reminded me of some very difficult years when I wondered if I would ever get married. Over and over again, through other people and through the whisper of the Holy Spirit, I kept hearing this message: “You are not forgotten.”

If your heart and womb are aching this weekend, if you’d simply like to forget Mother’s Day and move along with life, I want to echo the words I’m hearing:

You are not forgotten.

God has not forgotten you.

If you need to wake up and choose joy and go to church like every other Sunday, then do it. If you need to have solitude or quality time with your husband or family instead of fighting tears in church, then do it. Whether you wrote your mom a card, or if you’re grieving the loss of your mother, whether you’re hopeful that this might be your month to become pregnant, or whether you’re grieving the many years of infertility – you are not forgotten.

God has not abandoned you or forgotten you, He’s not leaving you alone in your grief. God is not unaware of your desire to have children, in fact, He understands the plan and the details more than we ever could. He wants us to know Him, to draw close to Him in our joy and in our sorrow.