My long road of infertility, motherhood, and loss has somehow drawn me closer to Jesus and helped me to dig into God’s Word. During the pandemic, when my friend initiated a Bible study via zoom, several of us said “yes!” It has been such a gift.

“Let’s study Hebrews,” said my friend after we finished discussing the book of Ruth. As we started digging in, chapter by chapter, we realized that we loved Hebrews because of some of those particularly inspiring phrases like “we have this hope as an anchor for the soul.” (Hebrews 6:19) We love those faith-fueling chapters like Hebrews 11 (all these people lived by faith, therefore we can too) and Hebrews 12 (reminding us to run the race before us).

I ponder these passages often, however as we’ve studied our way through Hebrews, I’ve been thinking more about the fact that Jesus is central to our Christian faith. Jesus makes all things new. Jesus changes everything. Even the history of time is marked with “BC” and “AD” because His life and death forever changed the world!

This week’s discussion involved the old covenant versus the new. We looked at Hebrews 9, discussing how the high priest went into the most holy place to make an offering to God on behalf of the people. When Jesus came as both the sacrifice and the high priest, He changed everything. He brought us salvation from our sins, the hope of eternity with God, and He is our mediator. Because of Jesus, we can now talk directly to God! No longer do we depend on a priest to go between ordinary people and God.

The story of a specific high priest came to my mind because it is one of my favorite Bible stories: the arrival of John the Baptist. In my years and years of trying to have babies, I have scoured the Bible for references to infertility. I have learned that Jesus truly is a man of sorrows, that He understands all of our pain and grief – and for me the pain and grief surrounding my childbearing has been immense. Jesus is our burden bearer – He’s the one who takes all of that pain and grief so that I can be okay. He’s bearing my burdens so that I can run the race set before me.

The priest, Zechariah, and his wife Elizabeth had asked God for children. They were upstanding citizens, living honorable lives. However, they were old and childless. I imagine that they were a great-aunt and great-uncle to children in their town, that they were even a pseudo-grandparents to little ones in the neighborhood. They were old and barren and I imagine that they were also okay with that. I imagine that they had accepted it and moved on, that they just living their lives, including Zechariah’s position of serving in the temple.

According to Christian history, at this point in the story, we know that for hundreds of years, nobody had heard directly from God. He had been silent.

And then one day, Zechariah’s turn had come to step into the holiest place of the temple to bring a sacrifice to God. An angel appeared – something he had probably never seen or imagined – and he was terrified. He didn’t know that he was about to receive some life-changing good news. (He was also about to be more tired than he thought possible, parenting a little boy late in life, but ultimately, this is good news!)

The first story told in the New Testament, the first documented encounter with a supernatural God in hundreds of years involved a message to a couple who had experienced a lifetime of barrenness.

The angel said, “Don’t be afraid, Zechariah, your prayers have been heard.”

I wonder if he thought: “What prayers?” Or maybe he knew exactly what the angel was talking about.

I think it’s very likely that Zechariah and Elizabeth had quit praying for a baby. They had prayed for years, but then they set it aside.

“Your wife is going to have a baby boy, and you’re going to name him John, not a traditional family name. He’s going to be a joy and a delight and he’s going to prepare mankind for the Lord’s coming.” (The angel said a lot more, and I suggest reading Luke 1 for the full story.)

I love the fact that old people who had probably quit asking God for a baby were miraculously given a baby. A womb that was well past its prime somehow carried a new life. God chose an infertility situation to show up and do a miracle, the very first miracle of the New Testament.

When I think about how Jesus changes everything, how Jesus came as the high priest as well as the sacrifice to make all things new, I can’t help but to think of this vivid illustration. This priest was doing what he had always done, being faithful to God, living a righteous life, worshipping as he knew how.

And God showed up. God took away their infertility and gave them a son. God used that son to usher in the ultimate high priest, Jesus, so that he could change everything. This Son of God who makes all things new began the story by making an old womb new.

This fills my heart with faith and hope for myself and for many women I am praying for.

In the past decade as I’ve been praying for women to have babies, many have been in their 40s, some in their 50s. Many are also in their 20s and 30s, hearts aching and struggling with infertility. As I’m now 41, my heart continues to wrestle with these things: Do we keep praying for people to have babies later in life? Is it a good idea to have babies later in life? It is more difficult in some ways, but I am reassured that God has been doing this for a very long time. Throughout history, God has been giving babies to older women, opening the wombs of Elizabeth and the Sarah and many others. I truly believe that God determines the exact times for babies to be born. He’s got it all figured out.

I have friends who have wrestled with infertility and barrenness who have come to a place peace, saying something like, “I’m okay, I’m not going to have children but I’m okay.” Some have reached menopause. Some have had a hysterectomy. It is okay to be done trying to have children. If you’ve reached a point where you have peace with childlessness, I support that.

But there are some of us who feel old and weary and tired of praying, yet we still hope to have a baby one day. There is still a spark of faith inside of us saying, “God, my arms are open if you want to fill them with a baby.” If that’s you, I hope this post has encouraged your faith.

Jesus came to earth to change everything. He keeps coming into our hearts and our lives to change everything. I’m totally convinced that He’s always good, even in our waiting, even in our losses. I’m still convinced that He’s able to bring forth miracle babies, just like he did with Zechariah and Elizabeth.