1) I’ve learned that I can endure difficult things. No trial in my life has been more difficult than enduring nearly 100 cycles of failed attempts at pregnancy. We were actively trying for most of those months, so we learned how to be steadfast in our faith and hope in the face of repeated disappointment. Seven years of infertility taught me perseverance and endurance. I can do hard things!

2) My body became accustomed to the doctor’s office poking and prodding. Obstetric appointments are less invasive (and less frequent) than fertility clinic appointments. And after you’ve had people look up your insides numerous times, well, I don’t feel nervous about that aspect of labor and delivery.

3) I began learning about how hormones affect me. I was on the rollercoaster of monthly mood swings for more than two decades, ramped up in the last few years by fertility drugs. Somewhere along the way I learned to chart my cycles, which led me to understand many times when I feel angry/upset/tired/livid/grumpy I’m actually just hormonal. I wish I had understood that as a teenager and young adult! Add in the disappointment of infertility and it’s even worse. Every woman should strive to understand the hormone-to-emotion correlation! Hormones aren’t an excuse for anger/hurting people, but knowing why you’re feeling that way can help with perspective and communication. In contrast, I have personally found that pregnancy has been the most emotionally peaceful time of my life as an adult! (Not everyone feels that way when pregnant after infertility, but I’m glad to have had 9 months of more stable hormones.)

4) I don’t fear childbirth after experiencing decades of severe menstrual cramps, endometriosis leading to a 5-inch surgical incision across my abdomen, plus two laporoscopies, one combined with a D&C to remove polyps. Walking through difficulty and learning to trust God for decades has helped me to overcome fear in many areas. I’m planning to give birth knowing that what is usually a painful experience will bring forth our long awaited baby. I can endure because of the joy before me – my husband and I cannot wait to meet her!

5) I’ve resigned control (mostly). While learning about childbirth, it seems that some of the most difficult births are because of unexpected circumstances. Sure, I like the concept of “making a birth plan,” but when you find yourself seeking a doctor’s help to become pregnant, you realize these things are not always your decision. I lost my rights to how the baby would get in there, so I’m not holding tightly to any preference of how she gets back out. Yes, I have preferences, but at the end of the day, I just want to hold this baby I’ve waited many years for.

Hi, I’m Betsy, and I live in the Washington, D.C. area with my husband, Mike. We have been married since 2008, and look forward to the arrival of our first baby in 2018! We enjoy exploring new cities together on foot and doing life as a team.

I write because I feel called and I enjoy it, and I hope that my words point you toward God! My first book, Embracing Hope During Infertility is intended to infuse hope into your heart! My second book, although written for children, will point you toward the goodness of God, even in the darkest times. Most recently I published a book for new authors or people who dream of writing a book. I hope that Write Your Story helps you publish a book as well!