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Earlier this year, some local women and I started an infertility support group in the DC suburbs. It has been a safe place to listen to each other and pray together. Even though our situations vary, we all understand the deep disappointment of negative pregnancy tests, the emotional struggles we face, and the social and relational complications that arise from being childless.

More than once, I’ve shown up at the group meeting with a little gift for the other women. Although I wish we could just order babies from a delivery service, like in the animated movie Storks, I can’t, so instead I have given little tokens to help keep hope alive while we wait.

If you want to give a gift to a woman who is struggling to conceive, but she doesn’t think you really understand what it’s like, I want to ask you to pause and try to be very, very sensitive, because your gift might upset her more than it encourages her. (When in doubt, give her chocolate, wine, or a Starbucks gift card.) If you do give a gift to someone hoping for a baby, here are some items I have been known to give.

Worth the Wait onesie. You can find variations of these on Etsy. Search for them in Google or on Pinterest. I happened to find a sale at a local department store and bought quite a few to save for gifts!

Tissues. Knowing that tears would flow at our support group, one week I gave out pretty Kleenex packets with the scripture Psalm 56:8 “You have collected all my tears in your bottle.”

Hugs. Those little Hershey’s Hugs are a sweet reminder that there are people holding you close during your heartache.

Cards with scripture. I picked some up at my local Christian bookstore, speaking God’s word into each woman’s situation.

A little wooden “&”. This ampersand reminds me of the scripture in Daniel 3, where Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego are about to be thrown into the fiery furnace because they prayed to God instead of the king. They said, “God can rescue us, but if not, we still refuse to bow.” I know the reality of infertility is that you or I might not become parents. I want to walk through hardship with the attitude that says, “I believe that God can do this & if not, He’s still good.” That’s what the “&” standing alone means to me. (Here are some more images of that scripture.)

Depending on your relationship with the person you’re giving the gift to, an infertility book might be appropriate. I have listed my favorites in this blog post.

Regardless of whether you give a gift to a friend facing infertility, pray for them! Your prayers are powerful and effective – they get other people through the lowest times, and you will rejoice when you see God answer!

Affiliate link disclosure: I, Betsy Herman, participate in the Amazon Affiliate Program, which means that I will earn a small commission from Amazon when you shop through the links on my site. This income helps to pay for my website’s expenses – so thanks!

I’m Betsy, and I live in the Washington, D.C. area with my husband, Mike. We have been married since 2008.

My sis-in-law snapped this photo

We welcomed our first baby in 2018. You can read about our long road to parenthood in these blog posts, or read our story in my first book, When Infertility Books Are Not Enough: Embracing Hope During Infertility.

Seasons: A Picture Book is my second book, although it’s written for children, it will point all readers toward the goodness of God – especially in the darkest times. Most recently I published a book for new authors or people who dream of writing a book, and I hope that Write Your Story: Straightforward Steps for (Finally) Writing and Publishing Your Book helps you finish your book as well! I have another book in the works – my email list is the best place for getting updates on that! Subscribe here.